leomanaids:

bitchcraftandwiggatry:

dirudo:

"I’m not rich"

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"But I have a big dick"

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"I don’t have a big dick"

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"But I am rich"

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"I’m rich"

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"And I have a big dick"

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(via allgebra)

queendread:

I don’t understand the USA, all your roads are straight and all your cities look like they were planned using Excel.

Everyone knows the only way to build a city is to wait until a bunch of tiny villages merge together over centuries and create a sprawling clusterfuck of winding roads that make no sense and have no street signs and are impossible to navigate unless you’ve lived there all your life.

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(via ilikeducksandcats)